I’ve dated nice guys, I’ve been friends with nice guys, and I’ve objectively observed nice guys from the sideline while they sent "good morning" texts and bought flowers. It has to be a blow to the ego when you really like someone, but every action you make in an attempt to have that feeling reciprocated pushes her away. I’m going to betray all women for a second (many of whom love to pretend women think nice guys are just as sexy and desirable as bad boys -- ROFL, we do not) and try to get our perspective to make sense. ”The next day, she’s mailed baby clothes to your apartment with your last name embroidered on tiny matching hats.
They would attempt to monopolize my free time by asking to see me on every day off, which would potentially take away from time spent with my friends and family.
”No, she thinks, “He’s obsessed with me, and I can do whatever I want.”She is not going to respect or value you.
Just like the girl sending monogrammed baby clothes, you have erased any sense of urgency from the potential relationship with your early investment.
Stop trying to woo her, stop trying to create a fairy tale. Plus, you won’t have to pretend to be busy and ignore a girl you like, which constitutes as playing games -- the most immature and counter-productive move you could make.
Hang out with your friends, volunteer, and get some work done. You should genuinely be busy with work or your other hobbies and obligations.
Then, when you are free, ask her on a nice date and take your time getting to know her. She will find you more attractive for having a well-rounded lifestyle, and the time you do spend together will not be taken for granted.